He was in his 90s – I never imagined he would sexually assault me
He was in his 90s – I never imagined he would sexually assault me
At five, I fell in love with the art of acting. For years, I had dreamed of studying under a celebrated instructor in Los Angeles, but life kept pushing the goalpost. It wasn’t until a few years ago that the desire to pursue it became urgent, compelling me to take action before time slipped away.
During a private session, the mentor I had long admired—a man in his 90s—unfolded a disturbing act. I had always believed that if I were ever sexually assaulted, I would stand up to the perpetrator. Yet, in that moment, I was frozen, unable to utter a word. His behavior was calculated, calm, and disarming, as if the act was part of a carefully rehearsed routine.
It felt like a serial occurrence, a pattern I had never considered. I wasn’t the first, and I wouldn’t be the last.
His assistant, a man in his 30s, remained silent, watching as the abuse unfolded. When I opened my eyes, I turned to him for support, but his gaze drifted away, betraying his involvement. I felt too ashamed to confront him, especially since the assault had been woven into an exercise, making it seem almost natural.
On November 25, 2024, Metro launched This Is Not Right, a campaign to tackle the persistent violence against women. Collaborating with Women’s Aid, the initiative aims to highlight the severity of this crisis, urging awareness and action.
After the session, I burst into tears, the weight of the experience crashing over me. The image of him as a wise, respected figure made the violation all the more profound. His career and personal life seemed to validate his authority, yet the abuse felt inexplicable, rooted in a different era’s norms.
I later wondered if the behavior of older men was shaped by their age and past experiences. Still, growing up in a ‘different time’ is no excuse for sexual assault. The incident left me questioning the assumptions I had held for years, shaking the foundation of my belief in his mentorship.
For weeks, my emails to the teacher went unanswered. I feared I had waited too long. Then, unexpectedly, his assistant extended an invitation for six private lessons, promising a unique insight into acting. I had thought his age was a benefit, believing his experience would elevate my craft.
On my first day, the studio was empty, and the teacher’s assistant stayed by as the session progressed. When he asked me to close my eyes and say his name upon something happening, I complied. But his hand moved swiftly, penetrating my jumper with a force that felt both sudden and deliberate.
Victim Support offers assistance to those who have experienced rape or sexual abuse. You can reach them at 0333 300 6389. The trauma of the encounter lingered, and I needed to share it to make sense of what had transpired.
Occasionally, I would bring it up when something triggered the memory. The number of people I spoke to who had similar stories was a sobering reminder that such assaults are not isolated, but part of a larger, silent epidemic.
